Internal Family Systems

According to IFS, the mind consists of several sub‐personalities or “parts”. You’ll notice this when, for example, a friend asks you to an event and you respond with, “well a part of me wants to go but a part of me doesn’t.” We speak for our parts all the time – we just often don’t notice it. 

While every human has these parts, those who have experienced trauma, chronic stress, or mistreatment have parts that are more extreme, more polarized, and can cause damage if left unchecked.

TRAUMA HOLDERS OR EXILES

Exiles are young, wounded parts that hold the memories, sensations and emotions of difficult events and are stuck in the past. 

They have experienced trauma and often become isolated from the rest of the system in an effort to protect the individual from feeling the pain, shame, or fear of these parts.

When activated, Exiles present with extreme feelings and/or beliefs. They can become increasingly desperate in their effort to be cared for and to have their story told. 

Once relieved of the burdens that they carry they are usually the most sensitive, vulnerable, playful, innocent, creative and intimacy‐loving parts. 

MANAGER PARTS

These are the parts that are pro‐active and run your day‐to‐day life . 

They seek to maintain balance within the system by keeping us in control of every relationship and situation in an effort to prevent the feelings of the exiles ‐ pain, shame, fear of rejection etc. coming through and taking us over. 

FIREFIGHTERS

These are the reactive protectors – they are heroic, impulsive, and often seen as destructive and narcissistic by manager parts. The goal of the firefighter is keep exiles away from you – to distract from or get rid of their feelings.

They come into play when the exiles are activated – they distract or dissociate to prevent overwhelm or flooding of the inner system.

ASSUMPTIONS OF THE IFS MODEL

• Everyone has a Self, and the Self can and should lead the individual's internal system.

• Parts that have lost trust in the leadership of the Self (usually as a result of early experiences) will blend with or take over the Self.

• All parts want something positive for you and will use different strategies to maintain their role and gain influence in the internal system. 

• There are no "bad" parts, and the goal of therapy is not to eliminate parts but instead to help them find their non-extreme roles.